Is It Worth It to Add Another Parent?

It is a very big question whether or not adding a second parent into your child’s life is going to help or hurt. This is a very reasonable question. It is a very common assumption that a child’s life is going to suck if there is only one parent, and having two is really going to impact the children the way they need to be impacted. However, there are plenty of drawbacks of being in a “nuclear” family, or a two parent family.

One con to dual parenting is the connections to the outside family. If the immediate family is too closely connected, it can be hard to let outside family in. Maybe that’s due to mistrust, maybe fear of reaching out, maybe an altogether lack of interest in them. That can lead to bad relationships within the outside family which will negatively impact the family as a whole.

Another possible con can come from stepparents. Not all stepparents are good. Some are downright mean, evil, and can be easily influenced by favorites. If a family has multiple children in it, a stepparent might pick favorites and dismiss the others, especially if a stepparent brings their own child from a past relationship into the new marriage.

A very good example that I can provide is my own life. My mom remarried after my sister was born. This man loved my sister and my brother but hated me. I was the victim of so much abuse from this man because I wasn’t the favorite. From the day they married to the day they divorced, I was the punching bag.

Another good example, even though it’s not real life, is Cinderella. The stepmother brought her two children and ended up hating and dismissing Cinderella. These examples are very good indicators that stepparents aren’t always the way to go.

However, there are some advantages to remarrying. One pro is that if the new parent is good, there will be unconditional love for your children, and that is what any parent would expect and should demand from someone acting as a father figure. If the child feels loved by a new parent, not only do they connect a strong bond with that parent, they will actually start seeing them as an actual parent.

At the end of the day, it is up to you and the family. If you all are ready to accept another family member in, it can be very rewarding. However, that always comes with risk. You just have to make the choice together.